So, Wisdom* is prodding me to share notes from my Journal. She says that you may recognize yourself here. It’s scary to me—I’m a very private person, but I will follow and post some personal Journal notes following this guidance. Ugh. I’m stepping out in faith my friends, but I find that following Wisdom/God is always better in my life. 🙂

Did you ever read or hear or learn something that went right to the core of you? Something that jarred your long held notions—those beliefs that have kept you on an even keel moving through life?

9-8-2021 “I am reading words that are so jarring and disturbing to me that I have lost my “balance.” I recognize the ideas somewhere within myself as important—even as truth—but it is beyond my human ability to comprehend right now. It seems to be bypassing my brain and going to another place deep within me.

I am discombobulated, disconcerted, and all those ‘dis’ words that are undoing me as I am, and moving me—nudging me to shift and grow in a new direction.

Not quite ‘ouch,’ but like a little earthquake—shaking me down deep somewhere. So now I am called to PAY ATTENTION. Not in a fearful, active way, but in a surrender…let it happen…way.

And the tremors from the shifting quakes arise into my life and cause me discomfort, as nothing is the same as it was a moment ago.

Ah…now I see. Now I recognize it. It is God—moving me out of my comfort zone and drawing me closer. The anchor to my little boat has been pulled up and I am adrift. Going with the wind and current of God’s call and movement.

I’m looking for something to hold onto. I miss Yusef and the words I could hear so clearly. But that voice is gone for now—something God often does to me—takes away the props, the supports I’ve grown used to.

So I will float on the wind and current of my loving God, surrendering in trust that I am held firmly in love…. And with that ‘giving-way’ comes JOY, sweet in its reassuring presence. The JOY-God says I AM HERE. I AM IN ALL THIS. Oh that feeling…!!

And I say, Thank You! Amen. So Be It.”

*Wisdom—The new voice/guidance I know as Wisdom, or Tuoleep, or most recently, Mother.